Back on Track

Time to spend a day with God I reckon.

I woke up at 12.30pm, (so its more of an afternoon + evening with God) and decided earlier this week that there is a need to get back 'on track' with God.

I use those words carefully, because often we go through life and say "I've got to get right with God" or "I gotta get back on track" - it sometimes makes it seem that at some stages we feel we are completely 'right' or 'on track'. Whilst we can be at points where we are more God-directed and God-centred, we have to also keep in mind we'll never be 100% 'right' with God; we never spiritually 'arrive'.

It's a big problem I face - I go to church, I do all these outside of church activities like BSF, Grow Group etc. And this is the case for many MANY Christians today. And though we don't say it, we many a'time act like we have hit 'spiritual maturity' and act like we have it all together. It's not so much consciously saying "I'm all that", but more the lack of trying to grow, and lack of pushing and pursuing His heart and the lack of intentionally sharing God with those who are yet to know Him.

We have to acknowledge and truly be convicted that we are SO FAR REMOVED FROM GOD, and it's 100% about His grace. His unending love and how much He gave for us so we could experience true life and true freedom.

I don't mean that we never spiritually mature, mind you, but more that we never hit a point where we can say "Yep, done. I am now Christlike. Level up."

That in mind - over the holidays, with the lack of things to keep you 'in check' (everything going on break - like Grow group, BSF, youth leading etc), as much as the relationship with God should be enough motivation to have Him in our thoughts - often it's not. It's human to need things to do, like regular Bible studies and meeting with other Christians.

In fact, I really see a large portion of Christianity is to do with people. In fact, number one is God - that you 'love the Lord God with all your heart, mind and soul' - and the second? Love your neighbour.

So if it's all about people, then those weekly meetings with other Christians is vital! Sharing with others is vital!

SO, without these things, I've been less disciplined, less in focus, the prayer life became sporadic, the devotions came on and off, talking to Him and listening to Him and reading the Word became random and almost when I needed it - rather than a daily commitment.

Thus, to today - where I'm have a 'day with the Lord'.

Sometimes we can place a lot of emphasis on one event or day - like a conference, or an eastercamp or something like I'm doing today. And no doubt, great things can happen - miracles, visions, insane convictions.

But I'm not banking on that today!

If that's God's plan, sure, go nuts, Your will, not mine.

However, today is more about getting the right perspective. About the baby steps.

I had a prayer session just now, and what came to me was this idea of taking steps into wet cement, where your feet really sink in. In this hustle and bustle world, with things getting insanely fast-paced and people wanting things more and more and quicker and now, we often think that our walk with God is all about sprinting and getting to 'spiritual maturity' as fast as we can.

But I reckon that it's really about taking those firmly rooted, founded, deep steps with God. Planting your feet on solid rock and moving forward. It's far less obvious the progress you make, but over time, you can look back and realise "Oh wow, I've climbed that mountain? I've gone this far?"

So I prayed for that, that today would be a shift of perspective, a step in the right direction. Where the devil could try and push me over, but I'm firmly rooted and held by the God who loves me so. Much better than taking quick steps and rushing, only to be pushed over quickly because it was an emotional high and I'm not sinking deep into the foundation which is Christ.

Anyway, then I read the devotional and it read from James 1:4

"Let endurance and steadfastness and patience have full play and do a thorough work, so that you may be perfectly and fully developed, lacking in nothing" 

It carries on

"To be steadfast is to be stable; a steadfast person is steady, calm and even-tempered, no matter what happens. When we mature spiritually to the point that we can maintain a level of steadfastness, then we do not react to every little harassing thing the enemy sends against us. Regardless of what he hurls our we way, we will not be impressed, afraid, easily upset, we wil not give up and not be moved if we are steadfast"

In order to be steadfast and immovable, we must know God and know Him intimately. We must be able to hear His voice when the storms of life are swirling around us.

WOW. Talk about Holy Spirit moment.

That whole vision of taking firm, rooted steps with God, really could be summed up with this one word: Steadfastness.

So that's my prayer for you and me - that we can realign ourselves with Him. That we can get to know  Him intimately. And that we can begin taking solid, firmly planted steps, with the Lord, so that we are steadfast and do not waver when the devil sends things our way. It doesn't take an instant amazing, fantastic and miraculous bright light experience (although it does happen!), but more often than not, its those small but solid steps that take toward Him:

Try the typical Sunday School answers: Bible, Jesus, Prayer.
- Read the Bible more.
- Talk and share Jesus more.
- Pray more.

Easy, and yet, how often do you do all three? How regularly?

 

Sit down and rest.

So I hadn't been to Envisage in a while (the young adults service that 2G aka. NLEC aka. the old ECC, hold), because of sickness and this and that and busy-ness.

It so happened the week I could come back, their annual "Kingdom" night was on, where it starts a little later, and is a combined youth and young adults service with a guest speaker - its an event of praise and worship. Been a while since I've gone to something like that.

I ended up sending a blanket text to everyone, and got 2 interested parties, of which one Gabrielle Chea fell asleep and didn't come along, and the other Sarah Soon joined me.

Since I've been listening to the new 'Shakers and Hillsong albums (despite not being a fan of Planetshakers music style, I actually have found the heart of their songs to be really genuine - at least a different style to Hillsong), and I was quite at home - I reckon going to a service and knowing the songs lets you free up a little more.

Anyway, life has been fairly overwhelming. And since last week, I've been progressively getting sicker and sicker. I've missed out on commitments like Student Life and church meetings and stuff and I'm sort of out of it. But during the service, after the sermon, God kept telling me "Sit down and rest." over and over.

And God graciously gave me a little revelation. Despite how I've been spiritually, maybe a little dry, maybe a little aimless, always room for improvement - He showed me something that I felt was pretty cool.

Often we can sing, or pray to find 'rest in God'. But what does it mean?
It should be as easy as sitting down. Sitting down is a natural thing for humans to do. See a chair on the train? You're gonna go sit on it - not a second thought. It's pretty much an action that's in our nature.

We were created in God's image. It was natural for us to walk alongside God, as Adam and Eve did - but sin got in the way. That does not change a single thing about our nature though. We're still made in God's image. Still meant to be with God. And so, resting in God should be something that we can do by default.

But Ashley, its hard to rest in God when you've just been rejected, suffered loss, disappointment, hurt, pain and brokenness. Or if you have so much to do, how can I have time to rest when this needs to be done, then that, and then that other thing?

There's no stock standard answer. But, taking time to genuinely sit with God and hear from Him? Or sing to Him? Read the Bible and reflect? Those seem like good places to start. But the idea is to be intentionally seeking to rest in Him. And be assured, He'll support you - just like.. a chair does.

So, I sat down during the music and praised God from my seat. Heck, I didn't even sing sometimes and just listened and meditated on the words and who God is. It was so easy to do.

The other half to the revelation is that, have you ever gone on an airplane and sat for too long without stretching? There was a whole commotion about some guy that was hospitalised because he didn't move for the entire flight and got some Deep Vein Thrombosis (where blood clots up in your veins).

If we sit and do nothing for too long, the rest that we've gotten in the Lord, the rejuvenation and refreshment, we sort of reach a point where you start getting spiritual DVT.

There are a whole bunch of holes in this analogy - my brain is ticking over them. But message that I really got from this entire thing, in short, was this:

1) Intentionally seek rest in the Lord. Make time or else you get burnt out.
2) Know when to take action, to be proactive in your faith.

At the end of the day, its a balance of resting, seeking, and acting. It can be easy to get caught up on either end, where we're all about receiving and not giving, or vice versa.

overwhelmed.

Jubilee was the first Bible study I did after I recommitted to serving God with my life, earlier this year.
Never had I done a Bible study for that long, and it was a real period of growth and so much of it applied to my life, it was God-planned. He had my circumstance and my heart and mind in His control.

One of the first lessons was on Sabbath.

That God did not rest on the 7th day because He was tired.
He did it to reflect and enjoy creation.
He did it as a change of pace, something different, other than creating things.

To translate it into my day, I need to have Sabbath in my life, where I take a break from the busy things and just reflect and enjoy God and be thankful for the blessings I have.

Lately, I feel overwhelmed. Everything ahead of me is superduper daunting and just looming over me.
My life is packed to the brim with catching up with people, ministry commitments, church commitments, study.. just .. so much.
Maybe this is how I'm going to develop REAL organisation and REAL time-management.
Maybe this is also a time where I'll learn to REALLY give everything to God and properly rely on His strength.

Because honestly, right now, I don't think I can get through this with a heart driven by my own strength.
I want a heart that is driven by that unending love.

I WON!

YES I WON!

thats me with my new prize, an infringement notice from the Victorian Police of.. Victoria.

Thanks Senior Constable Travis Stephens.

But really, with this fine addition to my other awards such as High Distinctions, F.N. Northcott Trophy, this really tops them all.

..Okay sarcasm aside, it is pretty disappointing to get booked. Especially for one of those new (really tight) road regulations. This one was for doing a u-turn through a continuous line. 

Yeah, ridiculous. On top of that, its a whopping $234 fine and 2 demerit points.

What a great way to end BSF right =P

Especially when money is tight and .. like I realised why we cling to money - because earn it. It's one of those things you feel like you deserve and belongs to you.

So, I'm a little strapped for cash lately, keep delving into my savings account and that, and have been asking God and talking to Him about this attitude I've got. I've never been that worried about cash, about spending on others and stuff - but lately I've been really really worried about money and how much I've got.

But with losing (and finding) my wallet the other week and this incident today, funny enough, God revealed a message to me, even in this frustrating situation.

BSF, John 11 was talking about how Mary and Martha had to deal with the death of Lazarus. But Jesus said that Lazarus death was to glorify God, much like the healing of the blind man (John 9).

God allows pain and suffering, often because in situations of hopelessness, God's power is most tangible.

So I suppose this.. disappointment, allowed God to manifest Himself.

I was asking God (when the lights were flashing behind me, making me feel like such a criminal) for grace and also what He wanted to show me out of this. And though there was a lot of disappointment 10 minutes ago, I've sort of nailed it on the head.

The fact that I am ABLE to pay $234. The fact that I can drive a car, and own that car. 

If you get my train of thought - The fact that I have a computer and can blog this using the internet, all these are signs of the reality that I am richer than 75% of the world.

There are countless people living in poverty, who cannot read, who don't even know if they will survive the night. 

So, in terms of material wealth, the lesson to draw from this is simply: Be Thankful.

"So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness" - Colossians 2:6-8

So yeah. God is sufficient as He is. Disappointing as this infringement may be, I'm glad to be endlessly blessed.

He actually lives and responds!

So I've been off facebook for 5 days now. I really want to know what's going on in the world, how many new comments or photos have been posted, events coming up, wall posts, I want to tell the world about what I'm doing - even if no one cares. I want someone to LIKE something I'm doing.


Apparently though, I'm not addicted (at least, according to this massively credible .. internet survey)

1. You lose sleep over Facebook

"If you're staying up late at night because you're on Facebook, and you're tired the next day, Facebook may be a compulsion for you," Lipari said. "You shouldn't be neglecting yourself because of Facebook."

2. You spend more than an hour a day on Facebook

Pile says it's hard to pinpoint exactly how much is too much time to be spending on social networking.

"I can't imagine that anyone would need more than an hour a day on Facebook, and probably no one needs more than 30 minutes," she said.

3. You become obsessed with old loves

Reconnecting with old friends is one of the great attractions of Facebook, and there's nothing necessarily wrong with "friending" an old boyfriend or girlfriend. But Pile warns that it can get out of hand very quickly.

"One of my clients met up with an old boyfriend on Facebook. They started spending hours and hours into the night talking to each other on Facebook. She made some really inappropriate comments about how unhappy she was in her marriage," Pile said. "Her cousin saw the comments and told her parents, and the parents told the husband, and now they're in the process of getting divorced."

4. You ignore work in favor of Facebook

"If you're not doing your job in order to sneak time on Facebook, you could have a real problem," Lipari said.

5. The thought of getting off Facebook leaves you in a cold sweat

Sarah Browne, who writes the Guru of New blog, gave up Facebook for Lent last month when she realized that she had a "mild" addiction to the site.


Of all these things, I have.. zero. Unless you include being constantly on Facebook "more than an hour of Facebook". But I'm not primarily on Facebook, I'm always 'studying' or chatting or youtub-ing or eating or.. multitasking.


Ideally I would be studying, but thats a different story. 
Very glad that I am not addicted though :)

Short of that, God has been nothing but amazing lately (though what am I saying, He always has been).


Started a new devotion book "Hearing from God Each Morning" By Joyce Meyer (and despite it's girly look it is a unisex book thank you very much.)

Getting into this whole Bible study routine and giving God my time and focus has been super rewarding!
Despite being raised in a Christian family, quiet time has never been a priority or a routine. It just lacked.


So really spending time with the Creator has been incredibly refreshing, and I love it!
Not only that, but coincidentally (more like, choreographed by God), each of my devo's have been directly related to the events of my day. Not like, "oh yeah, I guess that COULD mean that its related to my friendship problems", and twisting the message to suit me. Instead, if a primary school kid had a diary of my life and a calendar, they could draw the direct link between the chunks of wisdom and comfort that God has been giving me through Meyer's devo book.


Example:


June 11th - Talked about hearing from God and tangibly getting a message of wisdom or knowledge from God. I had an exam that day.



June 12th - Talked about Abraham and how "no disbelief or distrust made him waver, but instead he grew strong and was empowered by faith as he gave praise and glory to God". I had actually begun to start doubting and losing a little bit of steam since Jubilee the night before. Also exams sort of pull you away from God a little.


June 16th - So, I'd been literally learning. Not cramming. Learning. For the first time, Business Finance. In 1 and a half days, I tried to learn the entire course. Today was the day of the exam. And I was utterly exhausted, physically and mentally, and exceedingly stressed.
What did today's devo talk about? "The Source of Your Strength". All I did was smile and pray and everything left me. I honestly believe it was God's peace and comfort coming over me, but it was also a combination of the "there's not much more I can learn, I've hit a wall" resignation.


At the same time, I've been having this nagging question of how to love others. And through BSF and studying John, through reading "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris, listening to sermons about Evangelism, and through prayer, God keeps repeating the message that it comes back to the cross - the life and death and resurrection of Christ. To love like He did, through his actions and sacrifice that He made for us. That's how to love.


And God has really engraved that into my mind and heart lately, "THIS is how to love, Ashley".


So definitely something I have to try and work at, persistently, everyday - to love humbly, and serve everyone around me.


What a great God though, worth my time, my effort, my life, because He gave His for mine.




Continually thankful,


Ash

it changes everything.

So I finished my 50 day Bible study, "Jubilee" and I've got to say that the past 50 days really HAVE brought about spiritual renewal!


God took the study and my life circumstances, and caused them to align PERFECTLY. Whether the focus for the week was Redemption, Forgiveness, Healing, Sabbath, Justice or Proclamation, I can't explain how each of those topics and verses and studies came at the exact time when I needed to be refreshed, challenged or comforted.

Wow.

I was looking for a new book and stumbled on this one called "Crazy Love: Overwhelmed by a Relentless God" by a pastor by the name of Francis Chan. Must be good if its by a Chan right? :)

But theres a few lines in the blurb that caught my eye, and I really want to read and reflect on what this pastor has to say;

"God is calling you to a passionate love relationship with Himself. Because the answer to religious complacency isn’t working harder at a list of do’s and don’ts—it’s falling in love with God. And once you encounter His love, as Francis describes it, you will never be the same. Because when you’re wildly in love with someone, it changes everything."


Even though God has really shown that He is a living and responsive God these past weeks, I constantly find that my actions aren't pleasing to Him.


And I've been asking myself, "WHY am I doing this.. WHY did I say that... WHY am I thinking that?"
And I've come to the conclusion that I've somewhat lost the spirit of thanksgiving and humility that we should have, knowing who the Creator is, and the incredible sacrifice and love that He's shown to you and me.


At the very root of it, is that I'm not wildly in love with God. Many areas of my life are still dominated by self-interest! 


I can understand why 'when you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything' - from a human perspective, when a husband and wife, or even girlfriend and boyfriend love one another - their lives completely change! 


Their entire schedules get altered to spend as much time as possible with one another. They constantly talk, and give to one another and have each other in their thoughts.


And for a God that has loved us infinitely more, He is someone I need to strive to be with, and someone that I need to be willing to flip head over heels in love with. I want to experience and respond to this love that changes everything.


I'll have to hit up Koorong or Word this week anyway, because Josh, Jeff and Jesse are getting baptised.
Words can't even express the joy that comes from knowing this - I'm so excited for these three young men of God :)

2 Samuel 24:24

"I will not sacrifice to the LORD my God burnt offerings that cost me nothing."